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You Might Just Be From a Small Town If ...
- You hate the neighboring town during high school football season, but hang out with them after the season's over.
- You or one of your friends accidently dated a distant relative without knowing they were family.
- There's a farm directly across the street from your high school and everyone's driving their tractors and combines on a daily basis around town and even to school!
- You can name everyone you graduated with.
- You know what 4-H is.
- You ever went to parties at a pasture, barn, or in the middle of a dirt road.
- You used to drag "main."
- You said the 'f' word and your parents knew within the hour.
- You ever went cow-tipping or snipe hunting.
- School gets canceled for the opening of hunting/fishing season.
- It was cool to date someone from the neighboring town.
- But the town next to you is considered "trashy" or "snooty", although it's actually just like your town.
- You had senior skip day.
- A third of the guys in your high school wanted to become car mechanics after high school.
- Your car stays filthy because of the dirt roads, and you will never own a dark vehicle for this reason.
- Anyone you want can be found at either the Dairy Queen (Tastee Freeze) or the feed store. (Or, if you grew up in Saranac like I did, it was the SaraSnack.)
- You see at least one friend a week driving a tractor through town.
- Football coaches suggest that you haul hay for the summer to get stronger.
- Directions are given using "the" stop light as a reference (whenever one existed).
- Or you don't give directions by street names but rather by local landmarks (...past the water tower til you see the high school, then right at the church...).
- Your letter jacket was worn after your 19th birthday.
- You decide to walk somewhere for exercise and 5 people pull over and ask if you need a ride.
- Your teachers call you by your older siblings names.
- Your teachers remember when they taught your parents.
- When someone gets pulled over the whole town drives by at least twice.
- Everyone else hears it on their scanners.
- Almost everyone in your school also has a cousin in your school.
- Your only newspaper was a weekly.
- You never waited long at stop lights, but regularly waited 15 minutes at the railroad crossings.
- If you were ever pulled out of a snow drift by your neighbor on his tractor.
- If your standard summer job was baling hay, picking rocks, or pitching manure.
- Your town doesn't have a mayor, but rather a President (of the village council).
- The village council meets at the coffee shop.
- You schedule parties around the work schedule of different police officers, since you know which ones would bust you and which ones wouldn't - same goes with the game warden and hunting.
- You were ever in the Homecoming parade.
- The whole school went to the same party after graduation.
- You can't help but date a friend's ex-girlfriend.
- Getting paid minimum wage is considered a raise.
- The people in the city dress funny, then you pick-up on the trend two years later.
- You can charge at all the local stores without a credit card.
- The closest McDonald's is 45 miles away.
- So is the closest mall.
- You marched in the American Legion's Memorial Day Parade.
- You steal a speed limit sign and nobody notices.
- You move out of your parents house and into your first apartment and the post office forwards your mail without you asking them to.
- You laugh your butt off reading this because you know they're true and forward the list to everyone who lives in your town - because you know them all!!
If you would like to add your own favorite to this list, send it along to me at
and I'll consider it.
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This page is maintained by Ryan Simmons, at .
Updated in July 2006
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